Intro:
Verse:
Christmas really freaks me out. It makes me feel alone.
I think that elves are creepy. I'm not a fan of snow.
Forgive me when I say that Christmas is a bitch.
Chocolate makes my skin breakout. I don't like decorations.
I'm sick of all these cheesy songs that play on every station.
I think it's all so whack, but people seem to disagree.
Chorus:
The kids wait up for Santa Claus, the man with overalls.
He eats their milk and cookies, must have high cholesterol.
But who am I to judge? This guy is not even real.
Cause mistletoe and candy canes, all of its so freaking lame.
Sorry if I sound insane.
Christmas sweaters make me itch, decorations always glitch,
That's why Christmas is a bitch.
Verse:
There's people shopping at the mall for phones and big TV's,
wasting all their money on lights and Christmas trees,
making corporations rich, that's why Christmas is a bitch.
And every time I look around, I see a smiling face,
Is this a problem just with me or the human race?
All of these really annoying songs that people love to sing.
What can I possibly be missing from this Christmas thing?
Chorus:
Kids wait up for Santa Claus, a weird dude with overalls.
He eats their milk and cookies,
This guy has gotta have high cholesterol.
But it makes people happy, it makes no sense to me.
It's a fat guy who breaks into your house. It's bullshit.
There's mistletoe and candy canes,
I find all of this shit so lame.
I don't like playing cheerful games.
If only I could flip a switch, it's a complicated sitch,
That's why Christmas is a bitch.
Outro:
These stupid sweaters make me itch, decorations always glitch,
That's why Christmas is a bitch.